Woke up, fell out of bed, dragged a comb across my head...

Hector's weekday morning routine:
6:50 Alarm clock goes off
6:51 Roll out of bed and head towards kitchen
6:52 Get breakfast ready for kids
6:53 Notice that Patty is awake and in the kitchen... head towards bathroom
7:20 Emerge from bathroom fully showered, dressed, and ready to go
7:25 Ask if Samuel and Avery need help getting dressed
7:26 Tell Patty to hold on 1 minute because I forgot to do something... go back into the bathroom
7:29 Emerge again from the bathroom, tell Samuel and Avery that they've done a great job getting themselves ready for school, and head towards dining room
7:30 Call out to Patty from the dining room... ask if kids are ready to go to school
7:31 Get bag and lunch box that has somehow made it's way to the table
7:32 Leave to take Samuel and Avery to school
7:40 Drop kids off at school and head to work

Patty's weekday morning routine:
6:40 Alarm clock goes off
6:50 Snooze goes off, roll out of bed, head towards the back of the house
6:51 Wake up Samuel and Avery
6:53 Meet Hector in kitchen to finish making breakfast for kids
6:58 Go back to really wake up Samuel and Avery
6:59 Open Isaac's bedroom door and change his diaper
7:02 Feed kids
7:04 Put toothpaste on Samuel's and Avery's and Isaac's toothbrushes
7:06 Lay out school clothes for kids
7:09 Go in search of Avery's lost shoe... find it in Isaac's toy basket...
7:12 Remind the kids to eat faster
7:15 Start the coffee, and remind myself that I really should start setting the timer on the coffee pot the night before
7:18 Remind the kids to eat... EAT!
7:19 Take Samuel's, Avery's and Hector's lunch boxes out of the refrigerator, put kid's lunch boxes into backpacks, put Hector's lunch box on table
7:20 Make sure that everything the kids need is in their backpacks
7:21 Go in search of Samuel's library books
7:22 Tell the kids it's time to put their dishes in the sink and go get ready for school
7:23 Tell the kids to stop whining or I'm going to really give them something to whine about, and remind them that going to school is a gift... A GIFT, I tell you!!!
7:24 Remind the kids that when I was their age, I had to walk to school in the snow, uphill, without any shoes, with a wild mountain lion tracking my every move.
7:25 Take shirt off of Samuel and turn it around to be put on the right way
7:26 Take panties off of Avery and turn them around to be put on the right way
7:27 Tie shoelaces, clean Samuel's glasses
7:29 Wet Samuel's and Avery's hair and remove all cow licks, roosters, and any other farm animal that has popped up in their hair overnight
7:30 Help kids brush their teeth, wipe all toothpaste residue from their mouths, remove all "sleep" from eyes, and answer Hector in the dining room that yes, the kids are ready for school...
7:31 Zip up jackets, put on backpacks, give kisses and hugs goodbye, close the back door
7:32 Open the back door and give Avery one more kiss and hug goodbye, close the back door again
7:33 Open the back door yet again and give the dogs food and water
7:35 Let the cat outside
7:36 Plug in Samuel's Nintendo DS
7:37 Wipe off table and put away dirty dishes
7:40 Pick up all the dirty clothes off the bathroom floor and put them in the laundry hamper... the hamper that is sitting right there next to the dirty clothes
7:42 Take laundry hampers to laundry room and start a load of laundry
7:45 Turn off lights in Samuel's and Avery's rooms
7:47 Remind myself that while I'm there, I should pick out clothes for the kids to wear to school the next day
7:48 Pick out clothes for the kids for school the next day
7:52 Let the cat inside
7:53 Feed the cat
7:55 Change Isaac's dirty diaper and get him dressed for the day
8:00 Take laundry out of washing machine and hang it up to dry
8:15 Take folded laundry out of hamper and deliver it to appropriate bedrooms
8:25 Go back to laundry room and start another load of laundry
8:30 Turn on Sesame Street for Isaac
8:31 Get juice for Isaac
8:33 Sing Elmo's song with Isaac
8:35 Pour myself a cup of coffee
8:37 Make myself a bowl of oatmeal
8:40 Eat breakfast while checking email
8:45 Realize that Isaac is already bored with t.v. and go turn it off
8:47 Play with Isaac
8:50 Realize that Isaac is already bored with the games I want to play and get up to go finish my coffee
8:51 Realize that my coffee is cold, but drink it anyway
9:00 Hang up laundry again, and start final load of laundry for the day
9:10 Take coffee cup and bowl to kitchen sink, wash dishes, take out something to defrost for dinner
9:20 Get Isaac a snack
9:22 Clean up the mess Isaac made with his snack
9:25 Go to closet, try to figure out what to wear
9:28 Leave closet without anything to wear
9:30 Go back to closet, do not give up hope, push on, triumph over clothing situation, and find something to wear
9:42 Emerge from closet feeling frazzled, bewildered, emotional, but with clothes in hand
9:44 Wash face and apply wrinkle cream and dark circle cream under eyes, and apply moisturizing cream all over face... apply cream to cuticles, elbows, heels, knees, hands
9:50 Brush teeth, finally, and apply chapstick
9:53 Hang up final load of laundry to dry
10:00 Play with Isaac some more
10:05 Realize that the smell is coming from Isaac's diaper, again...
10:06 Change Isaac's dirty diaper
10:08 Put on Isaac's socks, shoes, and jacket
10:11 Put warm ups, socks and shoes on myself
10:15 Get stroller out of Suburban
10:17 Go on walk (weather permitting)
10:57 Return home feeling sweaty, but good
11:00 Drink water, try to cool down
11:02 Realize that I can not stop to cool down
11:03 Make lunch for crying, hungry, tired toddler
11:14 Feed Isaac lunch
11:30 Wash dishes, clean up kitchen
11:45 Change Isaac's diaper, get his room ready for his nap
11:50 Read books to Isaac, sing a few songs together, then talk about really important things like frogs or dogs for a few minutes
12:00 Put Isaac down for his nap
12:05 Make sure that Isaac has not gotten out of bed
12:06 Put Isaac back in his bed
12:11 Make sure that Isaac has not gotten out of bed
12:12 Put Isaac back in bed
12:17 Make sure that Isaac has not fallen asleep on his floor
12:18 Leave the room feeling thankful that Isaac has not fallen asleep on his floor
12:19 Take a shower
12:20 Wonder if that noise is Isaac, climbing out of his bed
12:21 Stay in shower anyway... really must wash hair
12:30 Emerge from shower, and ponder whether or not that outfit is really the best outfit to wear
12:33 Realize that it took long enough to come up with that outfit, and decide to not re-enter the endless abyss that is my closet
12:37 Reapply creams all over body
12:42 Apply anti-frizz cream to hair, and then dry hair
12:57 Put on make up
1:05 File finger nail that broke while on walk
1:08 Get dressed for the day
1:20 Make lunch for myself
1:30 Check email while eating lunch
2:00 Open bedroom door for Isaac and tell him what a great nap he took, the time just flew by...
2:05 Change Isaac's diaper, put on his socks and shoes and jacket
2:15 Put on my own socks and shoes
2:20 Realize that I can't find my jacket
2:25 Realize that I am as ready as I am ever going to be, and stop trying to find jacket
2:30 Find keys
2:35 Leave to pick up Samuel, Avery and Amanda from school

And Hector wonders what I do all day long...